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Hank Burns
Owner / Store Manager
The best friend of Tony, he’s a bit crass and greedy. But when the chips are down, Hank knows how to get things done even if it kills you.
Tony Parsons
Assistant Manager
The best friend of Hank. He’s a twitchy guy who has an unhealthy addiction to sugary drinks.
Monique Parsons
Sales Clerk
Sister of Tony and usually the lone voice of reason when the guys get into trouble. An insanely good Pac-Man player.

Calvin Grimm
Sales Clerk
A weird teenager Tony hired when Hank and Mo went missing.